I don't need to be Rescued.

One day my prince will come. One day I'll be rescued by a knight in shining armor. These are all the stories we hear growing up, all the things we're told about our future husband. Well I have news for you.

I don't need to be rescued.

I am rescued.

As a Christian, I know that the man I marry someday won't be my everything. He won't save me and solve all my problems. We will fight, we won't get along all the time, and that'll be okay. He's not supposed to complete me. He's not supposed to be perfect. Without a husband, I am not a lesser being. I'm not half of a whole.

I'm a whole human being, and he's a whole human being, and someday, miraculously, we'll find each other and when we marry, if that's God's will, it'll be a covenant to Him that we will represent Jesus and his Bride - the Church - and then, from that moment on, after we've made the covenant, we'll be one flesh.

Until then, I'm not waiting in my high tower for him to find me.

And I'm not searching for him either.

Sometimes, in Christian circles, marriage can seem like the ultimate goal. Sometimes, it feels as if people feel bad for older women who aren't married. And as a 19 year old, people assume marriage is right around the corner, right? Oh, you're not in a relationship yet? ...Why?... Don't you want to get married? Your mom was married and pregnant when she was your age...you have to catch up.

Yes, I desire to be married. No, it's not my ultimate goal.

If marriage happens for me, that is God's will and I will rejoice and be so glad and thankful for that.

But if it doesn't, I will not be any less joyful or any less thankful. Because that is also God's plan for me.

In the place I'm at right now, I am so thankful I don't have a significant other. I am doing well in college and working a lot, and that's already hard enough. Adding a relationship into the mix would be overwhelming. But if it happened, and God made it clear to me that's what He wanted, I wouldn't reject it. It would just be hard, and I'm thankful that God has me here without a relationship for now.

My entire family, my parents, aunts and uncles, were married and had their first child by the time they were 20. As a little girl, the only thing I wanted was to be a mom and a wife. I wanted to be married when I was 18. I hated the idea of college and there was no point to that for me.

God took me down a very different path. I'm 19 years old, I've still never been in a relationship, and I'm not afraid to admit that.

Today's society wants to put a lot of pressure on women to look a certain way, live their lives a certain way, and start dating at a young age. Some people might think I'm weird or odd for still being single, or for never being on a date.

If you think that way about me, that's okay. I've never been scared of looking weird or odd.

As a Christian teen, yes, I desire a Godly marriage to the "man of my dreams". But do you know what I desire even more?

A fulfilling and passionate relationship with my Maker. This is ultimately what God wants for every single one of us, married or single, man or woman.

A Godly marriage is indeed a gift. But not everyone receives that gift. And that isn't because of anything they have done or haven't done. And, for the record, singleness is a gift as well.

I can be complete, joyful, and sustained without a man. And I am.

Yes, I do desire to be married. I want to have babies of my own and raise them to love Jesus. But I am fully confident in the fact that the Lord, the maker of my heart and the keeper of my passions, will let me know when the time has come.

And I'm constantly learning to be okay with that, and to fully rejoice in the season that I'm in.

Three articles that I love that I encourage you to read to better understand my viewpoint:

http://www.desiringgod.org/articles/five-questions-to-ask-before-you-start-dating 

http://www.stewardship.com/articles/3-ways-you-can-serve-god-because-you-re-single?ectid=10.16.6289 

http://www.desiringgod.org/articles/wait-to-date-until-you-can-marry